Moving, Homeschooling & Renovating: Allison & Arjan Reflect Artwork

Couplehood

In the Couplehood podcast, you’ll learn key communication strategies that will help you speak your truth and share with your partner in a loving and constructive way. Hosted by Allison Villa - a registered psychotherapist and relationship expert - with a mission to empower parents to make their romantic relationship a priority. We’ll dive deep into the reasons why so many couples let the little things brew in their relationships — and how you can face these proactively to avoid putting your couple in the breakdown lane. You’ll discover why self-care can actually be the key to having a harmonious relationship and how easy it can be to schedule it into your day — even as a busy parent!

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Couplehood

Moving, Homeschooling & Renovating: Allison & Arjan Reflect

September 20, 2021 • Allison Villa / Arjan • Episode 36

“You don’t need to know how it’s going to unfold. You just need to take the first step.”
— Allison Villa

In this episode we are continuing the Couple’s Sandbox Spotlight Series, but for this special episode, I invited my husband Arjan to join me! We share some insight into where our relationship is today.

If you’re a couple that has experienced a significant lifestyle change this year like a move to a new location, switching to homeschooling, or completing a reno, then this episode is for you.

Arjan shares that in the past year we’ve had a lot of external factors that have impacted our relationship, including homeschooling our two daughters, ages 7 and 9, renovating our River House, and the day-to-day struggles which (let’s be honest) often take precedence over our relationship.

These lifestyle shifts take a lot of time and energy, and add greatly to our mental load as a couple. We were both surprised by our results from the Relationship Season quiz. We each took the quiz separately and the results gave us a lot to talk about!

In this interview, Arjan and I talk about some of the challenges we’ve had recently, and how our foundation of self-care, communication, and trust, has helped us move through those challenges together.

In this episode of Couplehood, you’ll discover:

● How a strong foundation can keep you connected as a couple, even in times of change ● The importance of your relationship within your family unit - remembering that what happens within your couple filters down to your kids

● How self-compassion can bring more patience to everyone in your life

“When you have the foundations of emotional trust and solid communication, you can still feel deeply connected as a couple despite going through hard things. ”

— Allison Villa

Highlights:

00:40 Meet Arjan

02:46 What relationship season are we in?

04:51 The importance of couple time

06:51 Being in limbo

07:30 Connected

10:00 The learning curve

14:44 Practicing words of affirmation

18:10 Letting go of control

19:28 Finding self compassion

20:03 Keeping our vision in mind

22:20 Gratitude

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